10. A Year in the Life of Two Mannequins.

Just outside of Whitewright, on Hwy 69, live two mannequins. I noticed them this summer, on one of the rare days we were expecting rain. One mannequin was on a bicycle with a rain slicker on, the other was wearing a matching slicker but standing.

As someone who has spent many hours trying to rip the clothes off of a mannequin only to spend equal time trying to redress it, I was riveted by the fact that 1) someone was willing to change their outfits at the slightest hint of rain and 2) this same person thought that mannequins could/ should be used as yard art.  Of course, with that said, I must mention that I have never actually witnessed anyone disrobing or re-robing these two and so it isn’t quite a stretch to believe them to be like the mannequins in the Twilight Zone episode, “After Hours”.  One day I may get out of my car to snap their picture, only for my family to drive by days later and see me added to the collection of ensemble changing mannequins… wearing a rain slicker and holding my camera.

I drive past this house on a regular basis. I always crane my neck, as I speed by at 70mph, to see what wardrobe choices are being made. Me, now intrigued by these two, thought maybe others might be intrigued as well. So I present… A year in the life of two mannequins…. (I will add pictures as the year continues)

New Year’s Eve photo:

On New Year’s Day I drove by and noticed that they each had a cold compress attached to the top of their heads. Unfortunately, I was late for work and didn’t have time to photograph it.


January 5th, 2012:

I am concerned. The male mannequin is no where in sight. She has changed and has her luggage packed. Is there a plot twist so early in my diary of the mannequin couple? I feel the matching vest and fancy hat might suggest that she is now single and on the prowl.


January 7th, 2012:

He’s back. How could they have ever parted when they both share such an affinity for vests?


January 21, 2012:

Lovers quarrel?

I am working to compile a list of questions to ask the people who own the house, whose yard these two mannequins inhabit. It starts like this:

  1. Do the mannequins have names?
  2. Do you have a mannequin story for them going on in your head?
  3. Are these your family’s clothes or do you buy clothes especially for the mannequins?
  4. Do you suffer from any panic disorders or are on medication to allow you to deal with people?
  5. Are you aware that they make clothes for pets and it might be considerably easier for you to throw a sweater on a chihuahua then to keep dressing two mannequins?


January 27, 2012

My two year old son, watching me from the window of the car, actually said, “Mommy, what they say to you?” It got me thinking… what if this actually is a message for me?


February 1,2012

Question #6: Are these mannequins symbolic of any situations in your life?

Perhaps the title of this blog entry should have been, “A Month in the Life of Two Mannequins”.


February, 2, 2012

Do not worry…. he is not dead.

February 8, 2012

After the attempted murder of the male mannequin I started to concern myself with the mental health of the person living here. I carefully approached a friend about it, wondering if I were the only person who noticed the saga that was playing itself out on the front lawn of this home.  “Is she sane”, I asked.

Her response sounded very casual, “Sometimes I wonder.”

February 15, 2012

I fear that I have failed you all. This morning the battery on my camera was dead so I wasn’t able to take a picture when the sign read, “Will you marry me, Roxy?” It is considerably more work keeping up with Roxy and ??? than I thought it would be when this initially started.  (A special thank you to my husband who took this picture for me.)

February 18, 2012

Hell, I don’t know. This isn’t really what I was expecting when I started the blog. Something about the handwriting isn’t so much informative as it is depraved. Somehow, reminiscent of the letter in I Know What You Did Last Summer.

February 22,2012

I am buying a zoom lens so I no longer have to get out of my car to take these pictures. I can’t stand the apprehension that this blog is causing me. Even though everything appears calm on the surface, I am convinced that someone is watching me from behind those drapes.

February 26, 2012

The change is subtle but can you spot it? What does this change mean?

Is this like the Liam Neeson movie, “Unknown”? Is this man just impersonating her fiancee? Or in an act of desperation, to win back her two timing heart, has he decided to get some Rogaine and a Schneider mustache?

March 1, 2012

Kim Kardashian eat your heart out.

March 14, 2012

I do not have enough time to go in to detail, about if I were a crazy person with mannequins in my front yard, how much differently I would have done this vignette. Happy Saint Patty’s, everyone.

April 1, 2012

Meanwhile, all seems peaceful in mannequin world.

April 26, 2012

In an attempt to steal my thunder the local Whitewright paper has done a write-up on the mannequins and their visionary, Martha. The caption under this photo actually reads, “Martha gives instructions to Roxy and Billy to clean up the yard.” This article has done nothing to convince me that the owner of this house is mentally stable. It actually says that SHE has a website about these guys and a huge storyline… such as:the other day Roxy’s wig blew off revealing that she is actually bald. This prompted Roxy to confess that she had lost all of her hair recently while trying a radical new diet.Seriously? I have gone back through all of my pictures and can’t say that I have noticed her get any thinner.

(Sadly, I have combed the internet for the website about these two and found nothing.)

May 2, 2012

Out in the front yard in a tank top, no bra, and curlers… they simply must be in small town Texas.


May 9, 2012

My informant has told me that something big is in the works for this weekend… I will keep you posted.

May 14, 2012

My informant was wrong. Roxy mocks me…

May 21, 2012

May 30, 2012

Roxy and Billy are boring these days. On a side note, this is the car Martha (mannequin visionary) drives.

June 20, 2012

#1??? First what? Is she picking out dresses? If so… who does she think she is fooling? She should be wearing the slut dress Scarlet wears in Gone With the Wind.

June 24, 2012

There has been contact!!! The STALKER is now being STALKED by the STALKEE.

Imagine my surprise when I opened this comment from another one of my posts…

Anonymous June 23, 2012 9:36 PM

i love estates sales! when i walk through the house and see someone’s life on display, i say “this will be me someday! when i’m gone, i have no doubt that my son will open up the doors, invite everyone in and sell everything. don’t get me wrong. i love him dearly and he loves me. but my ‘stuff’ means absolutely nothing to him.
by the way, i’m the “mother” of the mannequins on hwy 69. i loved your blog on them. i will watch it to see how i’m doing.

Mother? But I won’t digress…
I think I pulled off calm and casual when I responded, however…

“When I originally wrote that blog it was much more depressing. I have several objects of my grandmother’s, but without her here to tell their story, it’s like they have no history. Estate sales, to me, are just a bunch of items with no history. History is what makes a thing more than just wood or metal. It gives it life and warmth. 

Roxy and Billy will always have a fan in me. I look forward to seeing what the next five months bring them. If you could incorporate the Mayan calender’s end of the world prediction in your December display, I would appreciate it. :-)”
So if we see a volcano being constructed in the middle of Martha’s yard come this November we will all have ME to thank!!!

June 28, 2012

The poor picture quality is the fault of my husband (who I have recruited to help with pictures since I am now convinced Martha will pop out at any second and scream, GOTCHA!”) . I apologize. However, in his defense, I don’t think it really matters given this is a white, 1980’s pant suit that simply screams for a sequin eagle on the back it, reminiscent of Elvis.


July 1, 2012
I don’t know how I missed dress #3. I don’t know if I should be sad or relieved.  With that said, I still think it is getting my vote.

July 13, 2012

She has taken my advice, apparently, and gone with dress #3. Best choice by far. Bravo.

However, what is up with the creepy mannequin? As I understand it, mannequins are meant to be used in an effort to sell you something. I am telling you, right now, I wouldn’t buy ANYTHING this mannequin was selling… and if this is suppose to be the guy Roxy is cheating on Billy with… well, she shouldn’t be buying what he is selling either!!!

July 27, 2012

August 8, 2012

And today, I bring you a message from mannequin mother, Martha:

“in case you haven’t driven by lately, roxie and billy are back from their honeymoon in Hawaii. she had so much fun doing the hula that she brought a grass skirt home to entertain billy! martha”

Ironically, I had driven by, and photographed them, but I was perplexed as to if they were still on their honeymoon or not and was waiting to see if any more details emerged. Thankfully, Martha cleared it up for me.

August 17, 2012

My husband, Nick, has recently taken a job doing home remodeling. Yesterday, when he rounded the corner of one of the houses he is working on, he spied this:

Look familiar???

This is “Ed from France”. (At least according to THIS mannequin’s owner). Seems just a little coincidental, eh? At first, I felt that my paranoia was justified. Martha is toying with me… or the mannequins are real and know the best way to get to me is to take out my husband… but then reality set in and I remembered I am in a town of only 1,000 people and it was much more plausible that Martha just borrowed Ed for her wedding scene. Creepy nonetheless though, huh?

For the record, I own two mannequins at my store. Neither have names.

August 17, 2012

Another  message from Martha:

“i know who you are! i met your husband at the movie last week! do you drive a silver van? someone stopped and took a picture just after roxie got home from the hospital.

My response:

“‘i know who you are!’ ??? Your constant additions to my blog are doing nothing to reassure me of my safety while stalking your mannequins. 🙂
As for my husband, I think you met someone else…
Now, in regards to the hospital and Roxie: I can ALMOST suspend disbelief enough to buy the fact that she is now EXTREMELY pregnant (after it only being a few days since she got back from her honeymoon, pencil thin, wearing a bikini top and grass skirt) BUT the fact that Billy is still wearing, pretty much, the same outfit is hampering that considerably.”

August 24, 2012

I get the feeling that she doesn’t care about my opinion on Billy’s wardrobe. Which leads me to question if I will be getting my end of the Mayan calendar event after all.

August 31, 2012

Sept. 28, 2012

I had thought that I would  just go ahead and boycott putting further pictures of Roxy and Billy up until Martha changed his clothes. The casual reader of this blog wouldn’t have been the wiser BUT Martha, who stalks it, would have felt the full power of my outrage. So I have kept this picture, with its odd plastic pony, under wraps until today BECAUSE….

Martha finally caved and improved Billy’s outfit a smidgen.

A rainy September 28, 2012

October 5, 2012

What I am about to reveal may shock you. I want you to brace yourselves…

I left for work early and felt confident that Martha was not lurking… so I decided to venture much closer to the mannequins than I have ever ventured before.

Roxy has NOT been digitally altered. This is actually how she looks! Do you think that maybe she is blind? Because brace yourself, it gets worse…

This is a close up of Billy. Notice anything?

We have all been duped! Billy (or Billi as I will now refer to her as) is actually aFEMALE mannequin dressed in boys clothes with a mustache drawn on!!! Clearly, Billi can NOT be the father of Roxanne’s child! Oh, the charade that is being perpetrated on the streets of Whitewright.

October 25, 2012

October 31, 2012

What a cocky bastard this “Ed from France” is… how he just props his foot up casually, on the pumpkin, after delivering the baby. Poor Roxy looks aghast as the scene unfolds.. while, clearly, Billi can’t handle the situation so she decides to hang up her hardhat before passing out.

As a side note: While driving to Paris, Texas I ran across this mannequin set-up. Martha has some competition.

November 7, 2012

Life just gets harder once you have kids. Someone should have warned Billi.

December 15, 2012

For the last month the road in front of Martha’s home has had construction done on it, making it impossible for me to swoop over and photograph. Thankfully Martha must have understood this because she never bothered to change the mannequin family… I can only assume that this is also the reason for the absence of my suggested Mayan ending of the world display. I understand.

Merry Christmas Roxy, Billi, baby, Martha, and everyone out there….

January 4, 2013

My end of the “A Year in the Life of Two Mannequins” is very anticlimactic. Perhaps, this is a statement by the artist about parenthood. Heaven knows, as a mother of three, I wouldn’t have time to gussy myself up and attend any shin-digs to ring in the new year. However, I am still a little saddened to see it all end with a rotting pumpkin and Roxy missing an arm.

So I have decided to come up with a few endings of my own…

So, this brings our journey to an end. I feel confident that Martha has provided, somewhere in all of this, a message about our hopes, our dreams and our circumstances that we can all learn from. Or perhaps it’s a euphemism for the harsh realities of life. Don’t ask me to decipher any of it though. I have been clueless from the start.

I think the best conclusion for all of this comes from Martha herself:

“just wanted to let you know that i love your blog! as you can tell, i’ve gotten tired of it. so billy found work in calif. and they have moved to the land of sunshine.
but never fear, when the weather gets warmer i’ll think of something else for the yard.
p.s. loved your Mayan stuff. i wanted to do something, but all i had was an umbrella and i couldn’t make it stand up.

****This blog was moved from its original location on blogspot. If you are interested in seeing more of Martha’s comments you can view them here.

Author: Green Acres Learning Curve

City girl stuck in the middle of No Where, Texas.

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